This has been a subject on my mind for awhile now, but then there came that video from the San Francisco Gay Men’s choir and then, just other day, there came an article in the New York Post about a youth pastor, who “apologized” for banning bikinis on girls at a youth camp.
First of all, all of this apologizing for doing the right thing is getting out of hand. This would be akin of the ACLU (American Civil Liberties Union) demanding that I apologize for my views on homosexuality or the SPLC (Southern Poverty Law Center) demanding me to apologize for my fundamentalist beliefs.
What exactly, is morality? Merriam-Webster defines it as “conformity to ideals of right human conduct.” Rather broad in the flesh, but if taken in a biblical context, it’s a rather narrow definition.
“Right human conduct” must first be modeled and taught in the home, by parents, then fortified in the church by teachers and preachers of the Word of God.
Deuteronomy was the book that lays out the job of the parent, when it comes to bringing up the kids in the way of the Lord.
Deuteronomy 4:9-10: “Only take care, and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things that your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children’s children—how on the day that you stood before the LORD your God at Horeb, the LORD said to me, ‘Gather the people to me, that I may let them hear my words, so that they may learn to fear me all the days that they live on the earth, and that they may teach their children so.”
Deuteronomy 6:6-7: “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” This is also repeated in chapter 11:18-19, it’s that important.
Paul writes to the Ephesians, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (6:1-4)
Parents are the first line of defense, and instruction to children on moral issues, the Word of God is clear on that. If we, as parents, don’t model, teach and demonstrate moral behavior, how can we expect our kids to learn, and do the same?
This means teaching that there are consequences to bad decisions and behavior, such as unexpected pregnancy for fornication and adultery. King David can tell you all about that. Read 2 Samuel 11 and 12, where David takes Bathsheba, another man’s wife, sleeps with her, and she becomes pregnant – and the resulting consequences on top of the pregnancy.
Adultery is when sex occurs when one or both parties are married (but not to each other), fornication is when both are unmarried. Both are sin as it occurs outside of marriage to each other, and thus, the Bible considers that immoral.
Kids today – heck, anybody, can’t turn on a television or radio today, and not be bombarded with sexual innuendo through the ear gate, or images through the eye gate. You can’t go outside in warm weather and not see men and women scantily clad.
Teenagers and young people today, both boys and young men as well girls and young women have hormonal changes raging through their bodies, preparing them to “be fruitful and multiply.”
One problem is that there’s a double standard in the world today. We implore girls to be modest, but we don’t address the boy’s raging hormones.
We see Kim Kardashian strutting her stuff and flashing cleavage and booty – even grown men get excited – you can imagine the effect it has on a teenage boy.
We see male athletes and their trim, buff bodies, and women swoon over them. Teenage girls look at this and think this is normal behavior.
And where are the parents? Why aren’t they up in arms over the trash being forced on our kids? Well, one reason is that in some cases, today’s parents were too liberal and permissive, allowing their children to run amok without supervision.
I love the show “Growing Up Bates” on UpTV. Its similar to “19 Kids And Counting” but without the drama and scandal. Pastor Gil Bates is the father of 19 kids as well, and a preacher with his own church in Tennessee. In both cases however, they insist on the “accountable courtship model” where whenever their sons or daughters are with their potential mate, a brother or sister goes along to keep everyone accountable and their actions pure.
I see nothing wrong with this. I wish that my mother held me to this same standard, then I would have held my kids to this standard.
My very first girlfriend just happened to be the daughter of a Presbyterian minister – wild, and rebellious as all get out. Nothing happened – not because we weren’t chaperoned, we weren’t, it was fear of pregnancy – we were 16 years old. Chaperones keep things level headed, and it wouldn’t have gotten as far as it did!
Accountability is wonderful – for dating kids, and for adults as well. If you’re accountable to another person, you’re less likely to stray into sin.
This leads me to the church. At the time I was dating this girl, I wasn’t yet saved, and I wonder if she was. Her father was a church pastor for crying out loud! What was he teaching his daughter?
The youth pastor I referred to at the beginning of this – what message was he sending to not only the girls, but also the boys, when he reversed his “no bikini” policy?
One has to ask, did he allow boys to wear tight swim suits? That too, would be a problem.
Paul writes in Romans 14:21, “It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble.” He’s talking about the temptation of eating non-kosher food in front of a Jewish person, but the same principle applies here, we should never do anything that would tempt another person, and cause them to stumble.
That girl should have known better – if her father were teaching her correctly and had accountability measures in place. She could have been the one to plant a seed of salvation, but alas, she sowed a seed of sin, which could have been disastrous.
Youth pastors are especially on the front lines and need training to be prepared to deal with the raging hormones of the youth in his ministry. There are too many stories of kids in youth group getting away with all sort of immoral behavior.
There’s a megachurch just this side of the county line who’s had a couple of girls become pregnant by boys in their youth group, and stories of unattended youth having sexual relations in stairways. This should never be! Where were the adults?
This isn’t training up our children in the ways of the Lord – this is malpractice on the part of the youth pastor – and the senior pastor – at this church, and the youth pastor in the article!
Parents too, are just as responsible. This youth pastor received pushback on his “no bikini” policy – and instead of him holding his ground, he took the expedient way out, he gave in. Now, he’s getting pushback by the likes of me, and other pastors and evangelists. Parents should have rallied behind the policy, not fought against it.
The senior pastor of that church should have taken some disciplinary action against this youth pastor and reinstated the ban – pushback be damned! Dropping that ban was just allowing Satan a crack in the church’s armor to get in. That senior pastor is the shepherd protecting that flock, and he’s being derelict if he doesn’t act, and act swiftly.
And that video by the San Francisco Gay Men’s Choir, “We’ll convert your children?” Folks, if parents and churches aren’t all over this like flies to dog dung, they will succeed.
We can’t count on schools to help either, they’re just as liberal and permissive as anything – giving out condoms in schools to kids as young as ten? There are some classes that teach anal and oral sex, homosexual sex and other deviant behaviors, all in the name of inclusiveness. Parents need to on guard and involved with the school and district. Look over and insist and on seeing the school curriculum. If there’s something there that goes against your values, and those of Gods Word, pull your kid our of those classes if possible.
We can expect no help from the schools, unless enough parents stand up and say “No more!” Until that happens, nothing will change. Maybe we need more Bible believing Christians on school boards, so as to guide curriculum and to stand up to the liberal teacher’s unions who are pushing this garbage.
Until parents act – our kids are in danger, and that gay men’s choir will succeed.
So, who’s job is it to teach our kids moral behavior? Parents first, backed up by the church. If neither are up to the task, our kids are doomed, because the schools and the world, and ultimately Satan, will get them.
It’s up to us to see that Satan doesn’t succeed!